Irritated!

I'm incredibly irritated right now. All I want to do is get on the nest and read my boards that I normally do while Mike isn't home. And guess what? It's not working, I keep getting an error message & the more I see it the more pissed off I become! WTF? The keyboard also sucks which frustrates me even more!!

Why Why Why Why? I just need my girl time, especially on the PL board. Everyone is so supportive and I enjoy talking to others who also know how painful m/c are. It's heartbreaking that there is at least 3-4 new girls on there every day.

Between blogging and the PL board I've found a lot of comfort this time around! If only during my first m/c I would have known about this board and reached out to other women for support.

As much as I love my DH and appreciate his kindness, comfort and support, I believe no man will ever understand the pain of losing a baby. Not because they don't want to understand but simply they aren't a woman. I'm not trying to be sexist by any means, women and men are just made different. They can sympathize but they can't empathize. Please don't take this as men don't feel anything after their wives lose a baby, because they hurt as well and are disappointed but they don't know what joy you have even as you feel a wave of nausea coming on because your carrying his child, that you've made together. They simply don't understand that your mood changes on a dime for no rime or reason but just simply because and not because we like being mean. They don't understand the hurt, the heartbreak when we learn that we are m/c their child. We feel like a failure, sometimes the thought that we don't deserve a baby crosses our mind and other times we are so jealous of others who we feel don't deserve to be pregnant for one reason or another. Most of them don't get this and even those who have not experienced a loss cannot even begin to fathom any of our feelings. Which leads into saying all the wrong things....I'll save this for another time.

Well I'm off for tonight especially if the nest won't cooperate! Boo on you! I do look forward to reading one of my new books "Is your body baby friendly?" So far it seems pretty good but I'm all about understanding how the body works.