U/S 7w6d....

And we still have a heartbeat. Its beating at 158 bpm YAY! Baby T is measuring 7w 4d which I'm ok with and so is the Dr. :::phew::: My cyst is still there and measuring over 5 cm. Ouch! I am being released to my regular OB and have an appt November 13th. Wow...I hafta wait 3 weeks. ;-) Dr. said that where I am now, I have about a 5% chance of miscarrying which for us is pretty damn good and I'll take it.

Here are the 2 pics from our u/s.

"The Blob"

The heartbeat

Some of you may be wondering how big baby T is....
Baby T is growing like mad, putting on about a millimeter every day and continuing to straighten out in the trunk. Though you can't feel it yet, baby is moving those little arms, legs and (now only slightly) webbed fingers and toes like crazy.

Our Baby

And we have a heartbeat....

Yes its official! We have a baby with a heart rate of 118 bpm. It kinda sucks cuz Mike is telling everyone and I'm still like ok we aren't outta the woods yet. I know it sounds crazy and it sounds like I'm not being optimistic but...I dunno. It stinks that I can't be all excited. I mean I am...but I can't fully enjoy it, so it seems.

Anyway...hearing and seeing the little flicker on the screen was amazing. I'm measuring right on time. Of course, they never give me a specific week & day but oh well.

I was given Zofran to take because I have not been taking my antibiotic as prescribed for my sinus infection because I was terrified it would def make me puke. So we'll see if that helps. I feel like a baby and a whiner. I don't want to be Wendy Whiner but I guess I'll suck it up and just take it. If its whats best for the baby I'll do anything.

Ultrasound pic to come....

U/S tomorrow & nausea

So I woke up the past 3 days with nausea. Just nausea and today I finally dry heaved in the shower. How lovely! I'm kinda confused because I had 2 crackers & some coke in hopes to calm my stomach. I feel so much better when I have something in my belly. But none of that came up!?! I know everyone else would move on but its the medical side coming out of me...Sorry to gross anyone out. And DH didn't even check on me!!! MEANIE! I'm carrying your 'seed'!!!! <---I so hope you read this Mike! ;-)

Anyway...my nausea is not well controlled it lasts up until after work. So I feel like I'm the new girl who is the world's biggest slacker always taking breaks. And today they were long....I sat in a chair with a trash can in front of me waiting to puke. I kept telling myself...you'll feel better afterwards, I promise. I'm not a fan of hugging the throne. It just feels dirty and disgusting to me. I dunno why...

So after my dance class tonight I think I'm off to the store to look for a) sea bands b) cola syrup c) ginger & d) lemon drops. Any other suggestions??

I hate that I've turned into a pregnant girl that wants to bitch all the time. I remember promising myself after all my losses that I wouldn't but its almost impossible. Its not fun but I'm so grateful for every reminder and wouldn't change it for the world, as long as I stay pregnant with a healthy baby!!!

Anyway...tomorrow is the big u/s. We find out if we have a heartbeat. I haven't been too worried about it. I'm sure in the morning I will be having a panic attack in between throwing up breakfast. The morning/all day sickness is reassuring to me. Though I'm not sure I can handle it for the next few weeks. :-( Its tough to get up in the morning when all you want to do is lay in bed and fall back asleep. :::YAWN::: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....opps sorry!

Any positive vibes or prayers are much appreciated!!!!!

Of course I'm sick....

So finally we see what we are suppose to see at our 6 week u/s and less than 2 days later I'm sick as a dog. Really, is this necessary? I just want a healthy baby!!! I'm terrified that if we don't see a hb this week I will blame myself. I hardly had anything to eat in the past 24 hours but DH made me eat some peanut butter toast and drink some OJ and get a shower. I hate to admit it but he's right, I do feel better.

At one point yesterday I coughed, hiccuped and than thought I was going to puke. Sorry for the TMI, but it was the worse feeling ever. I pretty much laid around and slept as much as I could. I was miserable between the sore throat and barely be able to swallow all the extra saliva to feeling like I was gonna barf on any moments notice. WHY NOW? I need to be healthy! I need to support this baby. I can't be NOT eating. ARGH! Sorry I'm frustrated and still feel like crap!

Should be fun explaining to my new boss that I need some time off to go to the Dr's because I'm sick and pregnant and really need to take care of myself. BTW, my new boss already knows I'm pregnant and has been extremely supportive. Which is good...but I still feel guilty being the newbie and not feeling like I'm contributing as much as I should.

First u/s

So we had our first u/s today and everything looks right on track. This isn't a great shot but hey its the only picture I got. ;-)
There is a gestational sac (as if you can't tell) and a yolk sac. We expect to see a heartbeat next Thursday. So I can breath until then.

This so doesn't seem real, we've made it to 8 weeks before but we never saw a yolk sac. Its weird. I know I'm pregnant but I'm almost still in shock and disbelief. Also my Progesterone was 34.6.

Oh and they confirmed that the corpus luteum (sp) has reared its ugly head and that has been whats causing my left sided discomfort. Sorry for the short update hubby is calling me for dinner.

My heart is heavy....

Let's get the not so good news out of the way. The not so good news weighs on my heart very heavily. Yesterday I found out that one of our nesties who I've been following her blog religiously for the past few months gave birth to her son and lost him 16 minutes after she gave birth. They knew this was a strong possibility after their 12 week u/s and the doctors said something wasn't right. If you haven't heard Stacy, Spencer, & Issac's story here is a link to her blog called He Will Carry Me.

Its unbelievable how strong Stacy and Spencer have been throughout their entire pregnancy. Not losing their faith in God and believing in the possibility of a miracle. Her story gave many of us nesties hope, faith, and made some us re-examine our relationship with God. Its just an incredible story. I sit here and I can't believe what they have been through, I would have never handled it as well as they did.

I would really like to go to Issac's memorial service on October 18th to show my love and support. I don't feel obligated...I don't know Stacy or Spencer personally but on the PL, TTCAL, & SAL boards we are family and I want to be there for them. I feel a little weird but I think its so important to show them our love and support right now. Please let me know if anyone is considering on going. Also in honor of Issac, a playground is being built at their church and they are accepting donations. You can find more info on Stacy's blog.

So with that, I have nothing to bitch or complain about. I feel blessed to have sore boobs, food cravings, to feel fat & bloated, to be exhausted as all hell and to be able to jump down my husband's throat at a moments notice. ;-) He loves that by the way but sometimes I can't help it.

Anyway....my u/s is tomorrow and I would appreciate any positive vibes and or prayers. I'm nervous but hopeful. I'm anxious because the last time I was pregnant and got the chance to have an u/s it turned out to be a blighted ovum. I hope that their is more to see for some reassurance!

So F-ING Happy!!!

I'm officially done with my shitty ass job!!!! WOO HOO! It would be really nice to drink a whole bottle of wine tonight to celebrate but thats ok...I want a healthy baby more! No more drama!!! [hopefully] Cheers to a good weekend in Mo-town rooting on the Mountaineers and Sunday to relax and maybe work on some dance stuff. Ahhh....I love the weekends!!!

PS Some day when I'm bored, I'll write about the whole story of what went down at my old job. That feels so good to say!

853

Yup that is my new hcg number at approximately 16 dpo. AHHHH!!! They more then did what they were suppose to do from 10 dpo!! If my math is right 12 dpo should have been 48, 14 dpo should have been 96, and today should have been 182. My goal was 500 though. :::Wiping away the sweat from my brow::: All afternoon I was almost panicking, not that it does any good. My heart once again is racing from this good news. My progesterone went from 21 to 30. I can't believe it! I'm just so relieved!

Next big day is 10/9....for my first u/s. I've never seen anything but a gestational sac. I figure I'll be about 5 1/2 - 6 weeks pregnant by that time so a yolk sac :::crossing my fingers::: hopefully will be there and a heartbeat would be absolutely F($&ing FANTASTIC!!!!

I still haven't figured out my EDD or how far along I am. Maybe I'll go do that when I'm done. I've just been too nervous. But now that I know this isn't just another CP....I'm feeling super optimistic.

I've also realized with this pregnancy that this is out of my control. My little one is in God's hands and as much as I want a baby here on Earth I've come to the conclusion that I'm ok if that is not God's plan for this pregnancy. In some way its peaceful to know that my baby may be too perfect for Earth and God has other plans for him or her. I didn't realize or accept this during any of my other pregnancies so I'm looking at this as a good sign. It's outta my hands and all I can do is pray and think positively and somehow enjoy every minute of this pregnancy.