Thursday, July 10, 2008

Can we just fast forward a month?

So...yup sex week did not happen for us what-so-ever! Is it August 16th yet? Waiting a freakin month seems like eternity right now. I hate starting all over and having nothing to show. August 16th, would put us past my first EDD, so that would be great if we could skip over that as well! My OPK this month has been positive the past 3 days which is confusing to me. I never thought I ovulated this late. How can that be possible when AF is due the 19th?

I'm so frustrated. Things are not great at MrsJT's residence. I can't figure out what to do and I just feel trapped! Trapped in this hell, that wouldn't be hell if I didn't loose 2 babies. Some days I feel like such a failure. I'm tired of all these tests Lord. I swear I'll do whatever it takes to have a healthy baby in my arms in 2009. I know you will not put us through more than we can handle but right now I've had enough and don't know how much longer I can fight. I just want to surrender but that means I'm still a failure for giving up.

Sorry I'm already prepared for AF in a week. Bring on the those symptoms...the tiredness, the gas, the thirst, the peeing 8 times today. Screw you body I'm tired of all the tricks you have played on me!

3 comments:

Amanda said...

Thinking of you during your ups and downs and we all know that's what are lives are right now.

Kristin (kekis) said...

Did I write this or did you? I swear what you've said sounds exactly like what I've been saying lately. It sucks & it's hard to be patient and stay hopeful. I'm right there with ya!

Lesli said...

I hear ya! I'm still thinking of you through all this. I'm ready to TTC again next month so hopefully we will be pregnant again at the same time!
~Lesli